37 posts tagged “dancing”

i think i've eaten a full cup of choco-covered espresso beans today.

Oct 2, 2009
1 comment

and i still managed a nap... OHhhh the freedom of a day-shift Friday!

BF fiance and i are going to see a terrific show this weekend. It's a date!

My hair is fabulous. It had a much-needed trim and all the color updated.

I'm running a dance tonight. Nashville: come get your Blues on.. Global Ed Center 8:30 - 11:30pm. Socks will be rocked... if you act now, they could be your socks.

happy weekend.

i joined twitter.

Sep 16, 2009
11 comments

i have sworn, in fact as recently as yesterday, that i wouldn't be caught dead twittering... but something moved me today to join. i don't know what that 'something' was, but it was probably rooted in

a) my desire to have the twitter name i got before anyone else got it

b) my feelings of dance neglect and abandonment because none of the advanced/pro nashville swing dancers really care to come to my dance at the farmer's market unless NOTHING else is going on.

b) makes me feel bad about myself.... like i can't host an event worth going to. i'll keep doing it tho, hoping the beginner/intermediates get something out of it, even lacking the inspiration we all so greatly need to keep us motivated. one day, maybe some completely unexpected community member will find something about the dance to love, and it will change his/her life, and that will give me the validation i am so obviously, desperately, seeking.

blah.

fiance got new glasses. we're not sure they fit him well, but i can't help thinking he's just adorable, even in his ill-fitting glasses. i wonder what would have to happen to make him unattractive to me?? this must be love. i'm smitten.

a smitten-twittite.

i have a roomful of < > and nothing to show for it..

Jun 3, 2009
3 comments

Well.. i have lost my last dance contest. truly, i could lose a lot more if i really put my mind/money to it, but i'm done shoving money at impossible dreams, and i'm ready to start shoving money at merely improbable dreams.

i spent the last couple months training 'hard' for the camp jitterbug jack and jill. Yes, i could have trained harder.. but i don't have a partner, and i don't exactly have the money to supplement that kind of practice with private lessons. I'm not at all disappointed with my effort.. i did ok. and i had fun dances, and i didn't actually expect to make finals, let alone place. it's just not my contest anymore...

i'm not a dancer, i'm a person who dances. and the difference is huge.

so anyway, i feel strangely ok about moving on to bigger or smaller or better or worse things.. for now i think i will throw myself into running and yoga:: two things you can still excel at, even as an 'old' person. I will still dance and teach locally, and probably hit the occasional regional event, but i don't think you'll see me at a dance camp again. a penny saved....

we're saving for a house. actually we've been saving, for a while.. at least since i found myself rather remarkably out of debt. however, it's going to take another few years before i'm comfortable with the downpayment we've saved, and i think when my lease is up in November, we will find a rental (house) to call home for the next few years.. any suggestions? i want somewhere i can ride a bike. ideally, in nashville.

ok well.. i'll make a better effort to post more. i can't promise anything.. night shift has just about killed any entertaining things that might make it into a blog. but.. will try

people like me better when my shoes have no laces

Apr 19, 2009
3 comments

Or: i had a fucking amazing day, yesterday.

So... okay!

Background: i took the laces out of my keds. I really don't have a reason why, i just wanted to see them without laces and feel 12 years old again. i did and i do, and it worked, and i recommend this to every ked-wearer. Upshot is, i think it's seriously impacted my mood, or how people see me.. or .. something? How else to explain what a fantastic day i had yesterday?

1) got off to a great start with the farmer's market dance. we do this every third saturday at the nashville farmer's market.. this particular third saturday, a good chunk of our regulars (yes! we have regulars now) were out of town for one or another dance event in another city. Not to worry! i made sure to publicize the dance well enough in advance, and with the incentive 'bring a lead, get a candy bar'. we ended up with probably half the volume of our normal dance there, but all really fun people, and we were actually lead-heavy at one point. My newest friend here, Mama-L, brought her girlfriend and kids, and we all danced and hugged and watched the little ones play... and this inspired at least one other parent to bring his daughter out for a dance, while mama took pictures.

which was probably the cutest thing ever. painfully cute. In fact, so cute, we actually discussed holding a 15 minute 'lesson' at our future dances for any little kids who want to participate. they just look so excited; they've probably never seen grown ups dancing around in public, before.

I think kids are born dancing. life teaches you how to stop dancing, really.. society is repressing all those natural and beautiful impulses to spring up where you are and celebrate the joyful things in life.

overall, i'm way happy with this dance. for the last 5 third-saturdays, and yesterday in particular. we have an amazing, friendly, social group of swing dancers here, and i'm proud they come to an event i put together. I can't think of better people to represent me and the farmer's market and Nashville lindy hop.

2) BUT WAIT.. there's more... after the dance I drove up west-end to hit the earth day festival going on at Centennial park.. thinking.. OMG! Hippies! i'll be surrounded by like-minded recyclers....

It was fun.. people smiled at me. it was the keds, i'm sure.

I walked around the booths, picked up some flyers about vegetarian and other earthly things going on in nashville. I got information about Team Green (which i will probably join), and managed to promote our dance at the Market to the Bridgestone representatives at the Team Green booth. I think they may drop in on us at a future dance. (forgetting to take off your nametag has its benefits)

They gave me a tire gauge! (daddy, i told them how happy this would make you.. someone is looking after your baby girl!)

next i hit the Recycle Nashville booth where i asked the VERY accommodating Recycling-guy, Keith, all kinds of pertinent recycling questions. Such as:

a) what is the deal with clamshell containers?

b) what's up with starbucks????

c) do you have a list of other irate-persons living in apartment communities with no recycling? can we form a group? or perhaps a coup?

d) [and etc]

Keith answered every question, and gave me his email so i can ask him the other four questions i thought of immediately after leaving the booth. that will be my next project today.

In honor of earth-day-is-every-day-but-especially-sometime-in-Mid-To-Late-April, I will be compiling these questions/answers into a FAQ, which I will print out on reused paper at work, and which I will post on all my online presences.

I know, i know. you can hardly wait...!

On my way out of the festival, i passed a sort of nondescript booth for the Tennessee Department of Environment and Conservation, Small Business Environmental Assistance Program. On a hunch I stopped to ask some questions about environmental efforts at my office (which while it is not a 'small business' might still benefit from the information they can give me). Sharon and Ali were kind enough to answer some of my questions, and Ali gave me his contact info. He'll be getting a call from me bright and early on monday to address my specific questions. He has no idea, yet, how much he's going to help me and our office 'get green'.

3) I dropped off half of the items we chose for donation after the clothing exchange a few weeks ago. This stuff has been SITTING in my car; i just didn't have time to drop it off with all the work/tornados/dance lessons/hurt neck/travel to charlotte/etc/etc/etc/ad nauseam. Finally, this is done; i have a back seat again.

4) And then, i went grocery shopping, came home, and had tacos with the best boyfriend ever.

Ok i'm done blogging. Off to make today another great day :)

yay ya ya yay yay.

me

power pout

Mar 25, 2009
4 comments

i don't like to whine. sometimes i like to wail about things i don't understand, but i generally don't like to bitch about things i do understand completely, but can't change. it's annoying. i hate it in other people and i hate it more in myself.

with that in mind, i'd like to title this post:

HERE I AM WHINING ABOUT SOMETHING STUPID AND PETTY AND I CAN'T DO ANYTHING ABOUT IT ANYWAY SO WHAT THE FUCK, I AM SOME KINDA LOSER TO STICK OUT MY BOTTOM LIP AND GET ALL FIVE-YEAR-OLD ABOUT IT.

ahh so liberating.

A-train has a dance partner to practice with, and i don't. We're both competing at camp jitterbug, in The Impossible Competition No One at Our Level Would Ever Place In, But Hey What The Hell. I have already said i'd like to make finals, and mentioned how much effort i'm putting into .. what still might be an impossible endeavor. So anyway.. i'm doing what i can.. but A-train has a built in partner to train with, which is sort of crucial to the whole partner dancing thing. And she's working just as hard as i am, and great.. but with that extra little bonus ..

i'm feeling a little jealous, and a little discouraged.

see i told you it was stupid.

*sigh*

good conversation and a warm butt.

Mar 15, 2009
4 comments

yes, you read that right. Alumni hall on the vandy campus is where we had our special 'event' dance tonight. one of the coolest (warmest) things about the place: it's got these vented benches with heat just POURING out, so if you're not dancing, lets say because your mouth is full of ZOMG GIANT CUPCAKE ZOMGGG!!111 you can sit there and warm your ass. it's really, really, incredible. and the conversation part.. i was talking to a guy about what it's like to be one of the 'older' members of the dance community. Ha! i don't feel old. but relatively speaking, i'm pretty fucking old. enlightening.

and still, my hair is in braids. it's cute.

I'm super inspired. I had a masters class with our special guest workshop instructor on thursday, and i wrote down every word that fell out of her mouth. she's really good, and particularly good at the things i -suck- at. thus, the note taking. i spent some time watching lindy-hop videos on youtube, which is the homework I was assigned by the guy i take privates from. You know, see what's new, see what's popular, expand my vocabulary, etc. It's good advice. If i spent half as much time watching video footage of myself and other dancers as I do watching Fringe on Hulu, i'd probably be at least.. um.. 15% better than i am. it's just good material.

anyway i practiced some things tonight, with varying degrees of success. i did have a couple AWESOMEEE dances, including two with a guy i normally have.. super fun, but not extremely 'tight' dances with. tonight we just clicked. it was a great night, and many big props to the girls who put it together. it's amazing what a couple of 21 year olds can do when they put their little heads together.

<3 them.

ps boyfriend, we're hanging out tomorrow. i love you. MWAH.

and on the Xth day i rest..

Mar 7, 2009
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first of all.. i read this blog every now and again and the girl is CONSTANTLY calling in sick to work. Like.. a lot. How does that even work?? i don't even 'call in' anymore i just go in and wait for someone to tell me how shitty i look and send me home. I can't imagine just phoning it in once every 2 weeks because my <whatever> hurts.

but whatev.

news! news! news! i bought a BODYBUGG about thirty seconds after i read about it on Cat's Cranium. What a miraculous freakin device. Do you know in the last 10 days of wearing it and logging my food, i have realized

1) i burn more calories on days I have a dance lesson than on days i go to BOOT CAMP classes! who knew!
2) I don't eat enough protein..but...
3) i do eat pretty well overall, and i'm a lot more active than i thought.

other news.. the march installment of those classes for NSDF was canceled b/c no one showed up. or at least, not enough people to justify the classes. Now the beancounters are revamping the whole schedule. I feel badly about that, but i feel a little validated now that everything wasn't as humming-butterfly as they were claiming.

in other other news.. I am competing in the Jack and Jill at Camp Jitterbug.. I realize, of course that i have ze snowball's chance at actually placing.. but i would like to make finals. and since i'm totally -out- of dance shape, i have hired someone to give me private lessons twice a week in april and may, to get ready. between that and bodybuggin and running and etc, i should at least be in peak physical condition.. here's hoping for peak dance-ical condition. what harm can it do?

another busy weekend planned. running, food-logging.. getting measured by my friend EmShow.. she's going to alter some things for me. I love supporting the starving college student contingent of my swing dance friends. Saturday night is (maybe) honky tonkin.. Roberts at .. well probably 10? ish? 11 for sure.. maybe. definitely at some point. If anyone feels like dancing!

Oh and gotta see Watchmen. Wow.

today was a good day.

xo

this post is annoying and poorly written but i'm posting it anyway because i deserve to be ridiculed

Mar 3, 2009
4 comments

part of being one of the larger dance-fish in a smaller dance-pond means occasionally i have to do things like teach the itty-bitty beginner fish. back in cali, my excuse was always .. <$amazingProfessionalDancer>'s a better teacher than i am.. and she's still alive! why would i wanna teach? To a large extent, I still believe that while I am a good teacher, I'm not really a good enough dancer to guide the baby fish. It's not a confidence thing, per se... it's an experience thing. I haven't.. perfected my skills yet. How can I possibly teach them?

Unfortunately, philosphical arguments like the above are totally moot when you've got one [1] professional dancer in town, a serious lead-shortage and a large majority of your advanced dancers are in school. Factor in the innate flakey behaviors of your average lindy hopper (can't be on time, can't commit, doesn't have a car, etc) and it's slim pickin's for even a moderately qualified teacher. But a scene needs new blood, and new blood needs lessons and I'm not sure there's any legal way to bring the best, highest quality instruction out to nashville every tuesday night... so you make do with what you've got.

Once you've assembled your rag-tag instructor fleet, find a group of bean-counters to oversee the whole fiasco with a bunch of rules they don't feel like enforcing and the attitude that NON-PROFIT justifies NON-EFFORT. Combine well and pour into a clown-car.. ladies and gentlemen! the Nashville Swing Dance Foundation!

i am probably making it sound worse than it is. NSDF is, after all, a group of people who give up their nights and weekends to contribute to the swing dance community. It's a pretty thankless job, and they do it with a smile. more or less. But, as a contracted employee of the organization, I'm just not feeling the real commitment to quality, and that worries me.

For instance, I taught last month with a guy here, a super great guy, a super nice guy, and a really fun dancer. who doesn't plan.... at all. ever. I did put a lot of work, initially, into getting him to commit to a lesson plan for our four week series, but he just wouldn't have it. I settled eventually for finding out what his pet peeves were, so i could at least strive for accord in the class, if i couldn't plan the content. We did, you know, alright. But we didn't get thru what we (I) wanted to, we didn't encourage the quality of movement we should have, and i do feel like the students were a bit cheated by our partnership, something that was echoed by our class ratings.

I say "partnership" because that's what it is, for better or worse. we were to succeed or fail as a team, and we failed. His was a failure to plan, a failure to compromise. Mine was a failure to speak up, be aggressive; a failure to anticipate my partner's shortcomings and compensate for them. (my inner perfectionist is alive and well)

In any case, I let him bring me down, and that's extremely frustrating.... because i don't screw up! i just don't.

the class ratings are.. they are what they are. I can't change that now. But in an effort to make myself better or to understand our results better, I emailed and asked the beancounters how we ranked, compared to the other 3 classes which have been surveyed thus far. seems like a reasonable question, although I'm not sure anyone else would have asked if I didn't.

In response I received... seriously this is a quote:

how can you compare butterflies to hummingbirds.. while they both fly in the air, they are such different unique and wonderful creatures, to be treasured, loved and valued for their individualistic abilities...

wow. is there anything more useless and annoying? seriously? is this how you run your organization?

the other replies were all about how the servey was skewed, and how a bad survey gives bad results, etc, etc, ad nauseam. what. a crock. of shit. First of all, i've been rated on things before. I know how surveys work and this is why i asked how the other classes had done relative to ours. secondly, i like to think my performance usually is.. or should be.. so good that surveys don't touch it. My students should be so in love with me by course's end that their little hands just drift over to select the best possible choice. and then they should leave me comments on how wonderful i am, and how i've opened their mind and changed their lives and how they can tell how enthusiastic and committed I am with every breath i take. Like I said, i've been the object of a survey before. many times. and it is on this experience that i base my expectations. (that means up to now I've been basically awesome).

So anyway... i'm pissed at everyone*. they are all lazy and/or enabling motherfuckers.

*everyone doesn't include the other, statistically more awesome NSDF teachers. you guys rock. obviously.

(can you tell i got bored with this post already? I can.)

Officer, Officer, Officer...

Feb 23, 2009
2 comments

This weekend i was pulled over twice (and stopped once in my parking lot) within 15 minutes by concerned police officers letting me know my headlight was out. The first time I had no idea what I could have done wrong, but i was so tired, I thought it could be possible i sped or ran a light or something.. possible.. but not likely.

Nope. Just Officer Friendly encouraging me to get the light fixed. after freaking me out a bit and taking my license, insurance and registration back to his car for a gander.

Umm otherwise.. what an EXHAUSTING weekend. The farmer's market dance was a raging success.. we must have had.. probably 30 people there, and most everyone stayed the whole time. we got a lot of questions and a ton of people watching us.. including one older woman in a silver-sequined hat. she looked... like a jazz age superstar. awesome.

Farmer's market costs me $20 per saturday, currently once monthly. not a sizeable expense, unless you factor in the four-hundred dollars I spotted to chip in for the portable PA system.. It has been suggested that our local swing dance organization can undertake the cost of this event, but it really got me thinking about it; i don't want to give it up, at least not until it's sustainable, until it's a staple both in the swing dance community and in the farmer's market community. we aren't there yet. I'm also wary of people with other motives setting up any kind of 'policy' i don't agree with. Right now, our 'policy' is.. Music. No announcements, no marketing.. just music and dancing and we have some flyers out if people want them. We stay in our space, we are respectful of the area, and we clean up after ourselves. I have seen lindy hoppers take advantage of their venues too many times.. and this particular buck stops with me.

A guy I know helps his brother run a restaurant/bar here in nashville. I was talking to him about farmer's market and dancing in public spaces, etc, and he mentioned that swing dancers are among the worst customers he's ever had. In fact, he used to host a regular swing dance at the restaurant, but lost so much money, he had to stop it. says he:

"every time they flush the toilet, it costs me money"

I don't think i've ever thought of that, but he's right. Dancers think they're doing their part just to show up and 'support the band' and provide part of the entertainment for the evening. They forget that it takes just as much in terms of waitstaff and resources to host them at the venue as it does an eating, drinking, paying customer. But dancers are frequently underage, and more often, broke, and they stick to water. right there.. this makes them an unattractive customer, and it's no surprise we can never find a real club to host a swing night.

Farmer's market hasn't made any kinds of demands on us, but we have, i think, contributed a fair amount of business to the event. there's a variety of inexpensive food and drink, so it's easy to afford.. and we do get hungry.

well. i'm tired. I should try to stay up another 3 hours, but i'm not sure that's gonna happen. i think i'll have some tea and head up to bed to snuggle next to my warm and lovely boyfriend.

""create""

Feb 16, 2009
5 comments

I KNOW I KNOW.

i've been away for no better reason than, i was on facebook telling people 16 and then 25 random things about myself. if this keeps up, soon enough there will be nothing random about me at all. it will all be, simply, the most pedestrian and common details of the wide-open book that is my life.

ew.

i think i will start a policy of lying on facebook. half of what i say will be true, half will be false... just to keep it real. (which is funny because 'real' would seem to imply 'truth' but, come on.. reality doesn't always involve actual facts, in fact i bet it does even less than half the time). so, keeping it real, or real-ish.

25 random (truthful) things about the last XXX days i've been MIA

a) I started out keeping tabs on (what's left of) my neighborhood but eventually stopped looking. Not because i didn't care, but because it was sort of like one of those bad breakups where you know you've been unfair and you just don't want to deal with the aftermath, so you avert your gaze.

b) there was no aftermath

c) i'm ok with that. Vox (unlike facefuck) allows me the opportunity to peek in on your lives without feeling it necessary to comment on every. miscellaneous. fucking. thing. you do. e.g:

---Jane Doe is tired.

---Jim Beam found his keys.

---Spe Lunkin became a fan of spam.

d) <related> i'm back on night shift. While this is totally crushing to my social life, it works miracles on my 'antisocial' life, which means.. hellloooo my vox lovers <purr purr purr> do you still love me???

e) I'm sick again. i swear to GOD swing dancers are like kindergartners, in the level of hanta virus they tote around under their creepy little dancer fingernails and on the back of their sweaty necks. Ew.

f) I do believe I logged on briefly to pimp my farmer's market gig, but allow me to go into excruciating detail for you.. because i'm 'totes proud' of what it's become:: I MADE A DANCE OMG IT IS TOTES AWESOME.

g) to elaborate: I found a public space at Nashville Farmer's Market to hold a swing dance, where all my swing dancer friends gather on the third saturday morning of the month to dance to the best (deejay'd) jazz/swing/big-band/whatever music we've got. So far, it's a HUGE hit with the dancer crowd, and from what i hear from the civilians like it too.. WE WANT YOU to come dance with us. You don't actually have to know how to dance, no one even cares.. we just want to be a member of the community, and support something so awesome as the local farmers market. and we want to dance. to jazz. with you. (did i mention the 'you' part)? Next one is THIS COMING SATURDAY, 2/21, farmer's market, inside, 11-ish am to 2pm.

h) ha-ha. i was joking about the hanta virus thing. (note to self: provide hand sanitizer)

i) since initiating this post, i have already checked facefuck 10 times for new updates. *twitch*

j) I bought a mac!!! I am so, so deeply in love with my mac -even through our growing pains. I feel like we have so much to learn about each other.. like.. Where is the control key? why doesn't it work? how the FSCK do you cut-paste? WTF IPHOTO OMG SRSLY??? But like little Hope which flew out of Pandora's box on the heels of all those Troubles... there's a terminal window to make it all sweet and simple again!! so i can say: Mac, oh Mac i don't know why you iPhoto the way you do... but i sure as hell know how to fix it.*

k) *yes, i have had to reinstall MacOS once already. we try not to focus on that. we're trying to move forward in a healthy way.

l) i just figured out that command, with the weird clover -thing on it, + 'i' will make italics. watch..i will do it again.

m) my new years' resolutions were to give up plastic bottles and plastic bags. I am happy to report that since 1/1/09, i have sponsored the production of ZERO plastic bottles and only one plastic bag, because i'm an idiot and forgot that when you pick up take-out they usually put it in a bag for you. I am getting more comfortable bringing my canvas bags to the mall and carrying my purchases around in them. I feel like a shoplifter all the time, but no one has actually accused me of it. so maybe thats the trick (shoplifters, take note)

n) I went home to phoenix for the half marathon there, hung out with my family and a few of my friends. good times were had by all.. unless you count the first 72 hours where mom and i were having a fight so monumental that we've just made silent agreement never to speak about it again...

o) ...except with my therapist.

p) Jinkies came to visit in October, and we bought a box of wine to be ironic. except that it was actually kind of good and i've been buying it ever since. i'm sure that's bad, and i'll have to turn in my membership to whatever club it is that demands you at least pretend you know shit about wine. but it's cheap and doesn't suck and .. so sue me.

q) one of my cali friends had the cutest baby ever. his name is Connor. and i love him very much.

r) at 6 am, i'm going to take what I hope is my last round of Theraflu and fall into a deep slumber. When I awake, I will be well again. (and while we're at it: 5'10" and 108 lbs. and with a 190 IQ and a billion dollars..)

s) speaking of a billion dollars, i got a really good annual review at work :) Note that this in no way relates directly to a billion dollars, but it may indirectly relate to the smallish but not insubstantial sum I received for a yearly bonus. Most importantly, it echoed my own feelings on my performance: namely that I AM THE SHIT.

t) all the same, I'm really glad to be back on night shift. I like the work a lot better, and it helps me save money...

u) ...which I'm saving to buy a house.. soon.. well not so soon. but eventually.

v) I want to live in east nashville.

w) My boyfriend got a job at $NashvilleSweatshop , part time. I could go on and on about this, but i have to check with him first to find out what i'm allowed to reveal online. for now, suffice to say that in our entire lives together, in all my fumbling and clutziness, i will never give him as many cuts, bruises, and assorted injuries as he has received in two weeks on the job at $Sweatshop.

x) I downloaded a shit-ton of swing and jazz music today, because i was informed i'm expected to dj for an hour after the dance class i'm teaching on tuesdays. This inspires a cold panic in me. In all my years of swing-dancing i've never actually learned anything about swing-music. I only know the titles of about 5 songs, and only then because i had a routine or something to them... which means they're FAST and not at all suited for beginners. So i spent most of today with headphones on, trying to get a sense of style and tempo for something resembling a playlist for Tuesday evening. Dj'ing is an art, and it requires at the very least, interest and talent. I have neither. hahahah we'll see how that goes.

y) I'm going to DC in april, for a totally non-dance-related vacation to visit my friend Gangbuster. we are going to dress fancy and paint all the red doors we find, black :)